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Couples Counseling

If Your Relationship is Hurting…You’re In The Right Place For Help

“Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing there is a field. I’ll meet you there. When the soul lies down in that grass the world is too full to talk about.” ― Rumi
AREAS OF FOCUS INCLUDE:

COMMUNICATION

  • CRITICISM/ NEGATIVITY/ STONEWALLING:  Expressed as, “It’s always the same old pattern, no matter what I do or how I say it, it’s the same stuck place and I hate it!”
  • CONFLICT/ANGER/ FIGHTING “Angela, you don’t even know.  We can’t talk without fighting.  There is no hope for us.”
  • PARENTING DISTRESS/DIFFERING OPINIONS/STYLES “Our kids are out of control and we can’t agree on how to best discipline and parent them.  We are not on the same page”

TRUST ISSUES

  • AFFAIRS/ LYING/SEXTING: Expressed as, “There’s always something, some excuse.  I’m not even sure my partner likes me.”
  • PORNOGRAPHY/ ADDICTIONS:  “I can’t trust my partner.  I have been hurt by their behavior too many times.”
  • BROKEN PROMISES: “They say they’ll stop but they don’t.  They say it will change, but it won’t”

LIFESTYLE

  • SWINGERS/OPEN RELATIONSHIPS/ MONOGAMISH: Often expressed as, “We want to, or already have, opened our relationship, but now things are a mess.  We need help and guidance.”
  • KINK/BDSM/TABOO: “Not many people understand our sexual lifestyle, we need someone who is not biased to assist us.”

PERSONAL SEXUALITY

  • TRANS/ LESBIAN/ GAY/ BISEXUAL/QUEER/ QUESTIONING: Often expressed as, “We need someone that we feel safe with, that understands us.”
  • ASEXUAL/ PANSEXUAL/ BICURIOUS/ FLUID/ HETERO/HOMO: “I’m questioning my sexuality or understand it, but am having difficulty integrating my sexuality with my family, lifestyle, or identity.” 
  • POLYAMORY:  Possibly expressed as, “Poly is part of my identity, it is who I am and it’s difficult sometimes to navigate the feelings involved.”

SEXUAL HEALTH          

  • ANORGASMIA/ PAIN/ ANATOMICAL PROBLEMS: Often expressed as, “There is something wrong with me, I am broken.”
  • DIABETES/CHRONIC HEALTH CONDITIONS: “I have a medical condition, my sex life has been affected.”
  • DESIRE DISCREPANCY/LIBIDO: “I have lost my libido, we don’t have sex.”
  • ERECTILE DYSFUNCTION/ PREMATURE EJACULATION: Possibly expressed as, “We have created a negative feedback loop in our sex life.”

DEEPENING LOVE

  • ATTACHMENT/GROWING INTIMACY: Often expressed as, “We have problems like everyone else and we would like some coaching and guidance to make us better.”
  • UNDERSTANDING YOUR SEXUAL DANCE: “We are best friends but we’ve never been very sexually charismatic.”

TRANSITIONS/PHASE OF LIFE

  • PREGNANCY AND FAMILY CHANGES: Often expressed as, “I thought I would be happy, but I’m not.”
  • ILLNESS/DIAGNOSIS/ LOSS: “We need help but our grief, worry, or fear are overwhelming.”
  • RELOCATING/CAREER CHANGE, “We are having difficulty with this change, the stress is too much.”

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This video by EFT founder Dr. Sue Johnson explains what Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy is and why love is important.

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